I got in on the ground floor of this bad boy, you?
30 September 2008
Shares of DJ Pancake, Inc soar on announcement of revolutionary new "butter stick"
I got in on the ground floor of this bad boy, you?
Today's "The Family Circus"
SCENE
Billy and PJ stand near each other in a hallway. Billy is fully clothed. PJ stands in a diaper, looking sheepish.
BILLY: We taught Barfy and Sam to go outside...so home come PJ's still wearin' diapers?
Billy and PJ stand near each other in a hallway. Billy is fully clothed. PJ stands in a diaper, looking sheepish.
BILLY: We taught Barfy and Sam to go outside...so home come PJ's still wearin' diapers?
Latest and greatest from DJ Pancake Inc.
DJ Pancacke Inc. "Transforming the world into hand held sticks, one product at a time."
29 September 2008
BREAKING: DR PEPPER ANNOUNCES STRATEGIC PARTNERSHIP WITH PEPSIAMERICA, INC
The unprecendented move will boost distribution of Dr Pepper's Crush beverage brand in the U.S. South and Midwest markets with little congressional oversight. Other terms of the agreement were not disclosed. News of the historic partnership sent the DOW tumbling to a record low. DEVELOPING..
27 September 2008
25 September 2008
Wuscht Empire at population limit. Research military at the library
DJ Pancake has reached Enlightenment Age.
WITH GEN. FALANKY DISTRACTED, COLONEL GLUSS SOLVES ECONOMIC CRISIS
The Really Important Newspaper declares his plan "revolutionary...totally clear...it gets 7 (out of 10 possible) R. Pauls..."
24 September 2008
23 September 2008
Dear DP&L
FUCK YOU!
"...if you don't have power back by now, then there's a possibility you'll be waiting another 2 weeks for that electricity you so desire..."
Are you fucking kidding me? What a horrifying possibility. With just the parents at home now, I feel no need to be there except for sleep. I'm posting this from Jordyn's where I've been living the past couple days.
"...if you don't have power back by now, then there's a possibility you'll be waiting another 2 weeks for that electricity you so desire..."
Are you fucking kidding me? What a horrifying possibility. With just the parents at home now, I feel no need to be there except for sleep. I'm posting this from Jordyn's where I've been living the past couple days.
Today's "The Family Circus"
SCENE: Dolly and Thelma are conversing in the living room. Dolly sits on the couch and waves her hand around.
DOLLY: I Don't think any of the boys in my class will be my prince charming...right now they're all...well, you know, Mommy, like Prince Goofy!
DOLLY: I Don't think any of the boys in my class will be my prince charming...right now they're all...well, you know, Mommy, like Prince Goofy!
22 September 2008
Today's "The Family Circus"
SCENE: A very bruised, dirty, and upset Jeffy sits atop Thelma's vanity. Jeffy has multiple band-aids applied to him, and one tear drops from his left eye. Thelma attends to Jeffy's wounds with an antiseptic. Billy leans against the vanity.
BILLY: Maybe we could just get him bubble-wrapped.
BILLY: Maybe we could just get him bubble-wrapped.
20 September 2008
Today's "The Family Circus"
SCENE: Billy sits on a chair, looking at a "world map," featuring a picture of the Earth from outer space. Dolly looks over his shoulder.
Dolly: I don't wanna go to Timbuktu...I'd rather go to Timbuk-one.
Dolly: I don't wanna go to Timbuktu...I'd rather go to Timbuk-one.
19 September 2008
18 September 2008
16 September 2008
George Saunders on Sarah Palin
From the New Yorker.
A snippet:
"Do you know the difference between me and a Hockey Mom who has forgot her lipstick?
A dog collar."
A snippet:
"Do you know the difference between me and a Hockey Mom who has forgot her lipstick?
A dog collar."
15 September 2008
Ultimately,
the Army hopes the project will "lead to direct mental control of military systems by thought alone." That's why the U.S. Army has just awarded a $4 million contract to begin developing "thought helmets" that would harness silent brain waves for secure communication among troops.
Further reading
Further reading
12 September 2008
John McCain's Internet
“I am learning to get online myself, and I will have that down fairly soon, getting on myself.”
11 September 2008
SEPTEMBER 11TH CHANGED EVERYTHING
On September 11, 1973, less than two months after the first failed coup attempt (Tanquetazo), and less than a month after the Chamber of Deputies, where the Opposition held a majority, condemned Allende's alleged breaches of the constitution, the Chilean military overthrew president Salvador Allende, who died during the coup. US intervention in Chilean politics and support to opponents of Allende, including support for an assassination, has been documented by the declassification in 1998 of documents concerning the Project FUBELT operations, although its exact nature is still controversial. General Augusto Pinochet took over and established an anti-communist military dictatorship which lasted until 1990.
It has sometimes been argued that the removal of the democratically-elected socialist Allende by the US-backed Pinochet, among other factors, led the Soviet Union to partially step away from détente, and pursue a more ambitious foreign policy concerning Third World influence. As such the coup may have had a considerable geopolitical impact.
[COURTESY OF WIKIPEDIA]
It has sometimes been argued that the removal of the democratically-elected socialist Allende by the US-backed Pinochet, among other factors, led the Soviet Union to partially step away from détente, and pursue a more ambitious foreign policy concerning Third World influence. As such the coup may have had a considerable geopolitical impact.
[COURTESY OF WIKIPEDIA]
AP: Teacher OK after crashing into bear on a bicycle
Wed Sep 10, 11:17 PM ET
MISSOULA, Mont. - A middle school teacher suffered some bruising and a big scratch on his back after he struck a bear while riding his bicycle to school.
Jim Litz said he was traveling about 25 mph Monday morning when he came upon a rise and spotted a black bear about 10 feet in front of him. He didn't have time to stop and T-boned the bruin.
He tumbled over the handlebars, his helmet hit the bear's back and the two went cartwheeling down the road.
The bear rolled over Litz's head, cracking his helmet, and scratched his back before scampering up a hill above the road.
Litz's wife drove by shortly after the crash and took her husband to the hospital. He hoped to be able to return to teaching science at Target Range Middle School on Friday.
MISSOULA, Mont. - A middle school teacher suffered some bruising and a big scratch on his back after he struck a bear while riding his bicycle to school.
Jim Litz said he was traveling about 25 mph Monday morning when he came upon a rise and spotted a black bear about 10 feet in front of him. He didn't have time to stop and T-boned the bruin.
He tumbled over the handlebars, his helmet hit the bear's back and the two went cartwheeling down the road.
The bear rolled over Litz's head, cracking his helmet, and scratched his back before scampering up a hill above the road.
Litz's wife drove by shortly after the crash and took her husband to the hospital. He hoped to be able to return to teaching science at Target Range Middle School on Friday.
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